You can't have it both ways

A couple of days back, I was supposed to meet Drusilla. We didn't meet.

It all started because I had to head down to SIM to settle my uni application. I dropped her a message and asked her if she was free to perhaps meet for lunch. She said ok but she has class so when i get there then give her a call. Which is exactly what I did. Turns out, when I called her, she wasn't even in school. She had already left.

Honestly, I was like WHAT THE FUCK man. I thought you said ok already? And like, even if you changed your mind the last minute, is it that hard to drop me a text? saying perhaps like maybe "sorry john, got something else on, can't make it". Or something along those lines would have been fine. What she said? I thought you were sleeping so I didn't message you. And if I did message you, it was going to be like "are you still meeting me" which according to her is too shameless for her liking.

So much for good friends. I mean one text. how hard can that be. Granted i was jetlagged. But i woke up already. and she knew i was awake coz i dropped her a text. like how hard issit drus? I was so so disappointed. even more coz she didn't even see that she sorta just "pang seh" me. cummon its not like we're strangers. We're supposed to be close.

moving on, drusilla always mentioned. If you got anything to say, just say. how am i suppose to tell you i'm disappointed with you when you can't even drop me a text saying that we can't meet.

I told her anyway, and now?. awkward silence. She's ignoring me. And me?. I'm feeling like crap even though i still don't feel i'm WRONG in the matter. but what to do? I'm crazily in love with her. But you can't have it both ways can you?

STUPID JOHN. you're an idiot.